Note: The post below was part of our 2011 April Fools fun. We’ve left it live for you to enjoy!

Sometimes even the most secure digital sync method isn’t secure enough. If you want to ensure your data is 100% safe from even the most advanced hackers, your options are severely limited. Until now.

Today, we’re thrilled to announce CompanionLink Secure Analog Sync. For a monthly fee, we provide a highly trained CompanionLink Secure Analog Sync Agent to hand copy your data and store the information in a secure briefcase handcuffed to their body at all times. So how exactly does the new Secure Analog Sync work?

First, our trained Agent hand copies your data to a legal pad with a pencil, using manual encryption methods that require a secure cypher developed exclusively by CompanionLink to decrypt. The Secure Analog Sync Agent will then lock this information in a military-strength briefcase, handcuff the briefcase to their wrist, and follow you around as you go about your day. Anytime you need data, simply ask! The Agent will quickly open the case, decipher the data, and provide you with the information you need. And since the Agent always has a pencil on hand, you can add information to your database while you’re on the go. Once back at the office, our Secure Analog Sync Agent will input the data into your primary database.

With CompanionLink Secure Analog Sync, we’ve made it easier than ever to protect your data. To get started simply click the button below!